Monday, 26 November 2012

30 Things: #2 - Describe three legitimate fears you have, and explain how they became fears.

1. Heights... serious, serious issues with heights. I have no idea why or how - survival instinct I suppose! I try my best to get over it though; one tactic was when I was living in Thailand, to go onto the roof of our condo and walk ever-closer to the edge (the wall was lower hip height for me, so v.scary). I found that taking my camera really helped because my desire to take cool photos took my mind of my shaky legs!

I also rode a huge elephant through the jungle, down some very hair-raising slopes. My eyes leaked during the last five minutes when I actually thought I was going to plummet to my doom... but Dodo, my lovely ele, stopped, let me off, then 'protected' me while I regained my composure and got back on his neck.

Sunday, 25 November 2012

30 Things: #1 - 20 Random Facts About Me!


I found this excellent blog post from Cherishing Hopes and Dreams, via Pinterest - do read it, it's such a good idea. So good in fact, that I, along with many other bloggers, have decided to create a month's worth of posts based on the list.... although because I'll be on the road soon, mine will likely take more than a month!


I think it would be rather fun if you joined in too, and if we could all link to each other's blogs, and perhaps learn a bit more about each other. What do you think?

Monday, 5 November 2012

What is it like to live in Taroudannt?


Several people have asked me what it's like to live here in Taroudannt, and some from MFP have remarked that I don't seem to be eating much Moroccan food... so I thought I'd write a quick blog post on the matter! 

Everything we eat is Moroccan... but maybe not what most people's perception of what that is!


We live in a very small city around 50,000 people; it's not at all touristy, and only has a few restaurants. There are a handful of street vendors and several little open-fronted cafés which sell cooked food. However, it's all tagines... with meat in! There are two restaurants which will make us vegetable tagines but everywhere else, it's carnivore heaven!

There is not a culture of eating out here (the only people who seem to use the restaurants are foreigners who only ever stay two nights at most, on their way to and from other places!); most people cook at home, as I do. There is a wealth of fresh fruit, veg, herbs, and spices, plus lots of pulses... and of course, couscous!

Apart from our rent and bills, which come to around 23 USD per day, we spend on average, 6 USD per day on food (that's everything for breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and water) and household items (cleaning products, toilet tissue, etc.) - less than 30 dollars a day for all of our needs! Cool eh?

Food is very cheap here; for example, olives are 12 dirham - around a dollar per kilo, cherry tomatoes are 5 dh a kilo, and a loaf of khobz - flatbread - is 1.2 dh. Most people however, have very little money. There is high unemployment, which means that although the minimum wage is set at 3,500 dh per month (403 USD), in Taroudannt, most people only earn around 700 dh per month (80 USD). There are so many men clamouring for work here, employers can get away with paying as little as possible. People work seven days a week, often until quite late at night. Most women here do not appear to go out to work - apart from anything else, I don't think they would have time to do a job outside the home! 

It's a very hard life for the locals (harder still for those in the villages): there are no supermarkets here, no pubs, no clubs, no cinema, no trains, no fast-food places, nowhere to buy alcohol (not that I am aware of), no TV dinners, no processed foods aside from Laughing Cow cheese triangles, the occasional pack of fairy cakes, and some biscuits, plus very few modern western influences, barring satellite dishes, mobile 'phones, and the occasional knock-off tee shirt or hoodies! There are not many modern cars either - but there are lots of horses, donkeys, and carts!

Yet with little time, and little money, people here are among the most generous, both materially and spiritually, I've ever met - I have the utmost respect and fondness for them. On Saturday, my usual herb seller had run out of parsley, so I found a little old man who had a few bunches he'd no doubt either grown himself, or had purchased for a few dirham in order to sell on to make a very small profit (a huge bunch of herbs costs 1 dh to buy). Not only did he throw in a bunch of verbena for me to try but he offered to share his pomegranate with me too! On Friday, our neighbour called around to welcome us to our new home, and to present a gift of fresh fruit and Eid sweetmeats!

There is no state welfare here but despite the unemployment, no one goes hungry. They have family welfare here instead - people look after each other. If someone has no family, friends and neighbours will help. In fact, this has been true of every Muslim country I have been to. Leaving aside religious fanatics and fundamentalists (of which I have seen no evidence here), Muslims are the very soul of gentleness, kindness, and compassion. They are good people.

People here are very friendly too, and every merchant we go to teaches us how to speak Berber or Darija - every child/teenager wants to practise their French on us, and even a little English too sometimes! Our daily lives now consist of speaking a mixture of five different languages: Berber, Darija, classical Arabic, French, and a little English... six if you include our comedic miming/sign language! At first though, people used to stare at us (and some were distinctly wary) but now they say hello in the street, hug us, shake our hands, and invite us to join them for tea (we both love Moroccan mint tea)! Most of the merchants now charge us local prices (although occasionally we'll try a new one who will attempt to inflate costs!), and some even give us discounts. Most of them offer us freebies to try, especially when they get new biscuits or olives in! Yum! 

I adore living here; I loved Thailand but this is so completely different. It's like stepping back in time to a gentler age, where people care for each other (although they do in Thailand too, of course), where they look after each other, and where they have time for each other. Unlike Thailand however, there is not the sense that the western world is going to take over any time soon. Chiang Mai was fantastic but there are a lot of western expats, and a myriad tourists - if Taroudannt has any westerners living here beside us, we are not aware of them, and as I said before, there are few tourists, and those who do come, don't stay long because really, there is very little for tourists to do here... which suits us down to the ground!

We lead a very simple life here; we have very little, we need very little, and we desire very little - it's as close to perfect as I've ever known! 

Friday, 26 October 2012

Be Proactive!


Copying and pasting this to your Facebook Wall will not prevent children being kidnapped, or puppies from being beaten; nor will it eradicate breast cancer, testicular cancer, or homophobia. It will not foster racial harmony or religious tolerance, and it certainly will not bring back anyone's loved ones from the dead.

Do not copy and paste if you agree... go out and do something proactive instead.

Source unknown

Wednesday, 17 October 2012

Living in Taroudannt, Morocco


 In six weeks we've travelled to - and stayed in; twelve cities, towns, and villages, in four countries, across three continents! Two weeks ago, amato mio and I came to live in Taroudannt, in Morocco's Souss Valley. And we are loving it!


It was a bit of a culture shock at first - a world away from living in Chiang Mai, and a little bit daunting at first... but now people have got used to seeing us about (apparently most 'westerners' stay here two nights at most); shopkeepers and stallholders now wave and say hello instead of trying to get us to buy their tourist stuff, restaurant owners no longer need to give us menus, and we have made a few friends here. People are very kind and generous, and most have such a sense of fun!

We've been staying in a beautiful guesthouse, Dar Fatima, for two weeks, where we have made friends with the owners, Brahim and Jamilla (like me, they both used to be teachers!), and tomorrow we move into their apartment for the next three months - maybe longer!

Everywhere we go, people are teaching us bits of Darija (Moroccan Arabic), so we're thinking of giving up trying to learn standard Arabic because very few people here speak it! Some understand and speak French, which is fortunate for us, but we both look forward to the day when we are able to go to the souk and be able to get across in Moroccan what we'd like, rather than having to resort to speaking bits of five different languages! It's certainly a challenge... but we are getting there!

Taroudannt is pretty conservative, and I am so glad I asked around about what to wear - I came well-prepared! Barring a few younger people, who wear a mix of traditional and 'western' style clothing, most people here wear djellabas and kaftans - it's lovely!

Also lovely is that apart from some mobile 'phone shops and satellite dishes, you'd not really know the 21st century has arrived; there are no boy-racers playing boom-boom music in their cars, no nightclubs or pubs. There are no fast-food places, no McDonald's, Burger King, or Pizza Hut, and no supermarkets! There are lots of tiny family-run shops which sell things like loo roll, cleaning products etc. and a few items of pre-packaged confectionery but for the most part, the food all comes from the myriad butchers, spice merchants, grain sellers, and greengrocers etc. Oh, and patisseries of course! And there is a dairy, which sells unpasteurised products. Yum!

I have no idea what the big cities are like... but this is all the Morocco I've ever wanted. It's perfect!

Can you make a living from your hobby?

I was just chatting to a friend on Facebook about people making a living from their hobbies, and we both agreed that it's unlikely to happen. And we also agreed that it's hard to tell a chum who asks for advice that s/he just doesn't have the talent or the wherewithal, that they should concentrate on finding a 'proper' job, and save the hobby for the weekend. 

I'm a huge, huge advocate of following a dream but I also firmly believe that we should know our limitations. We have to understand and accept that at some point, we have to toe the line, which means knuckling down and being adult enough to say, 

"OK, I don't really like my shop job - it's tedious and the customers are often rude, but you know what? At the weekends, I get to run around the woods with my friends, dressed as a mighty wizard... and my boring job enables me to fund my hobby!"

I think the trouble these days is that we're constantly told in schools, in the Media, and by the do-gooders, that every one of us is extraordinary, and that we're entitled to an extraordinary life. And therein lies the problem: yes we are extraordinary... as a species - but that doesn't mean that as individuals, we necessarily are. It doesn't mean we deserve anything, nor have a right to expect anything. Whatever we want, we have to work hard for, and this is something so many people seem not to understand. A lot of people also don't comprehend that just because their doting partner adored the lopsided sweater they took six months to knit for them, it doesn't necessarily follow that people will come flocking in droves to commission more of their 'unique' creations! (OK, amato mio's sweater wasn't lopsided but it's definitely on the large side, and it did take me about half a year to knit!)

Sure, it would be awesome to be able to make a living doing the things we love to do but from experience, I can tell you that even if you do not end up loathing that thing, it will rule your life; you will have to work very long hours for a pittance; and it will always be an uphill struggle

People are constantly telling me I should open a bistro, and then express surprise when I tell them that it would be my idea of hell on earth (well, one of them)

"Why?" they ask, "You love cooking, and your food is amazing!" 

It's because I love cooking that my food is so good - if I had to do it for a living, I fear the joy would go out of it, and it would become a chore.... worse, it would become something I felt imprisoned by because I would be reliant upon it. I do the things I love doing because they give me (and sometimes other people!) such immense pleasure - far too many times I have tried to capitalise on them, only to realise what folly it is. I don't want to go down that road again!

A hobby is something which should relax you, help you unwind, forget the cares of the everyday world.... when it becomes the source of stress and worry, what then? Do you get another hobby... and then think, 

"Oh, perhaps I could make a living out of this?"!! 

There is a reason why there are relatively few professional artists, knitters, writers, designers, musicians, athletes, etc. in the world - and they are paid lots of money because they are a rarity. They do what they do because they're driven, obsessed perhaps, and they are only where they are because they work at their craft to the exclusion of almost everything else. None of these people woke up one morning and decided that this is who they wanted to be - they have been these people since they took their first breath, and they have spent all of their lives doing the thing they were born to do. And none of them believe it to be the soft option; working in an office, 9-5, Monday to Friday, is the cushy number... making a successful business enterprise from a hobby is not

These people are remarkable at what they do - most of us are not. Fact. The sooner people accept it, and understand that they may well not have a life less ordinary but that they can build upon they life they do have, the happier I believe people will be. And probably more fulfilled too.

Be thankful for the life you have - if you are reading this, you are already far more privileged than most of the world's population. You are remarkable in your own way - rejoice in it but don't try to make more of it than it is. And don't expect the rest of the world to view you as anything more than an ordinary human being... just as we all are. 

Wednesday, 10 October 2012

Be the change you want to see in the world...


Semi-literate indignant rants about how the system is failing, about how there is no justice, blah blah, and asking people to copy and paste to their Facebook walls is not pro-activism. No one who should care gives a fig for your Facebook rantings.

If you are not happy with things, do something positive, take action.

If all you are prepared to do is rant on Facebook, and believe it is enough, then really, you have no cause for complaint about your 'failing' system.*** By not being pro-active, you are just as much a part of the problem - your inaction is seen as acquiescence... is that what you truly want? If you want things to change, you have to do more than pontificate.

Be the change... don't expect others to do it for you so that you can reap the benefits.

~~~

*** A failing system, incidentally, which ensures you can sleep easy in your bed at night; which ensures you have employee rights; which enables you to live in comparative luxury; which gives your children (and you) the right to be educated; which provides you with good food and clean drinking water, plus shelter and warmth; which gives you medical treatment beyond the ken of most of the world's population; which allows you to have a monthly overdraft of more money than most people earn in a year; which does not put guns in the hands of your children; which allows you to walk the streets without fear of being raped; which allows you to choose from hundreds of channels to watch on your large flatscreen TV; to read whichever books you desire; to say whatever you like, without fear of recrimination. Some crappy system, eh?

Tuesday, 28 August 2012

Abortion Is Wrong... Really?

So....
Abortion is wrong. No arguments...
  1. It doesn't matter if the pregnancy is a result of rape: the onus is on the woman to take adequate precautions to ensure she does not become pregnant if she is raped.
  2. If someone is sterilised and becomes pregnant, she should not be having sex.
  3. If someone is sterilised, and over the age of bearing healthy children (e.g. if there is a chance they may have something wrong with them), she should not be having sex.
  4. A blastocyst is a sentient human being. 
  5. Abortion is the same as eugenics.
  6. Statistics are meaningless, therefore it is reasonable that in areas of high poverty, high disease, and high crime (including rape, murder, mugging etc.), more babies than can be sustained are brought into this world.
  7. There is no such thing as an accident. 
  8. If someone posts a pro-life propaganda image on Facebook, and couples it with the comment, "No discussion" - people are not supposed to want to discuss it because Facebook isn't the place for such discussions.
  9. If you don't agree that abortion is wrong, you have a rusted, closed mind.
  10. Rape-pregnancy is a smokescreen used by the pro-abortion lobby.
  11. Logically and scientifically, abortion is wrong.
  12. God and Jesus say that abortion is wrong.
Shockingly, the above were all from a female. 
  1. Trauma from rape is merely an emotional response, and raped women are therefore in no fit state to make the decision to have an abortion, should they find themselves pregnant.
  2. "Ask anyone whether they would have preferred their mother to have terminated them, and see what they say".
  3. If you put yourself inside the body of a rape-conceived child you would not want to be killed in a judgement call made by someone else. 
  4. Drawing a line as to when a group of cells becomes a sentient human being is wrong, and is "... a bad place to find yourself in".
  5. Despite being sterilised almost a quarter of a century ago because I didn't want any more children, and probably being too old to bear healthy kids, I am completely wrong to say that I would have an abortion if I found myself pregnant...
  6. "You'd rather enjoy your lifestyle than carry the life you made and therefore it should be killed because you'd be upset - and noone likes being upset so off with their head! Hmmm :/"
  7. "Perhaps they [aborted foetuses] feel entirely justified then in killing you if you're in their way?"
The above were all from a male... a stupid, blinkered male, at that.

There really are some nutters in this world.

Needless to say, my Facebook friends list has been reduced further. Not because people don't agree with me but because they are:

  • a) incapable of seeing any viewpoint other than their own, therefore it cannot ever be an equal friendship
  • b) because they did their best to make me look and feel like a worthless piece of shit because I don't hold the same beliefs as them.

Fortunately, they weren't actually friends - just people I've had dealings with via work.

I make no apologies for believing that not only should a woman be entitled to make decisions about her own  body but also about the rest of her life. And how fucking dare anyone who has had no experience of rape, pregnancy, extreme poverty, or violent crime, and who has only ever known their comfortable middle-class British way of life, presume to dictate to others how they should feel, and what they should do with their bodies?

I do however, apologise for the sweary bits... but that's how strongly I feel about the subject. Idiots.


Friday, 29 June 2012

Real Friends Do Not Encourage You To Jeopardise Your Health


Why is it that when someone overweight says, "I am going on a diet", or "I need to lose some weight", there are always sycophants who say things like, "Oh babe*, you look lovely... you have a beautiful figure - you don't need to lose anything"... even when the person is blatantly overweight or even obese (28lbs + is considered obese)?

Are people:
1. Thick - can't/won't think, so offer up a completely glib remark
2. Lying - afraid of hurting the feelings of others
3. Lying - secretly glad their friend is overweight because they think it makes them look good
4. Lying - an overweight friend justifies their own weight issues, and makes them feel better about themselves
5. All of the above
6. Telling the truth - they genuinely believe that being overweight looks nice

Surely a *real* friend would be supportive? They wouldn't tell someone they look lovely when clearly the person doesn't feel that way?

I don't mean someone wanting to lose 'a few pounds' (although even then, if someone feels they need to lose 7lbs, for example, they should still be supported), I'm talking about people who are obviously overweight. It's really galling to hear some of my friends being told they 'look fine', when what they are asking for is support (because they need it). It is unhealthy to be overweight, why would anyone encourage someone they allegedly care for to be unhealthy?

If someone doesn't feel right, and feels they don't look right, surely their feelings should be respected, and not be met with throwaway comments because 'friends' cannot or will not be honest with each other? Surely a real friend would be concerned for a friend's health and wellbeing, and would tell them the truth?

Real friends don't encourage indulgent beer and cake consumption!



*Could there be a worse expression?


Thursday, 7 June 2012

Spicy Food....Why?

It's not that I don't like spicy food - I do... as long as it's not too spicy - I just don't understand what the point is of having it so hot that it hurts to eat it.

Image credit unknown